Achieving a positive mindset takes practice. We are not where we want to be, and we often fall back to old habits of negative thoughts and complaining. Yet, there is power in having a positive attitude and cultivating happiness. In my research I have found that there are seven key practices to cultivate a positive mindset.
Practices to achieve a positive mindset
Purpose
"True happiness… is not attained through self-gratification, but through fidelity to a worthy purpose."
Discover your purpose
Discovering your purpose in life is a significant key to happiness. People are more motivated when they are living a purposeful life. To truly understand your purpose, you need to find an intersection between your PASSION, TALENTS and PURPOSE.
Take an hour or two to complete the exercise below:
- Step 1: Write three words on a sheet of paper: PURPOSE, TALENT and PASSION.
- Step 2: Give each word a separate section and write 5-10 things under each section.
- Step 3: For the purpose, list the things that bring you meaning. Under talent, list the things you are good at and under passion list the things that light you up.
Create a vision for yourself
Many experts recommend starting with a vision board. I have created several vision boards using Pinterest. Once you create a vision board, take the time to craft a vision statement. An excellent time frame to start with is ten years.
Questions to get you on your way:
- Where do you see your life in 10 years?
- Describe your perfect day 10 years from now?
Examples of how to structure your vision statement:
- My goal is to _____ so I can ___________
- I want to ________ so I can use my talent in _________ to help________
- I am driven by __________ to provide ____________ so that ____________
Write your goals
See our posts on goal setting and template to help you write your goals. Once you have completed your vision board and vision statement, it’s time to list the goals you need to accomplish to reach your vision. Remember to write out Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic and Timebound goals.
You can then break these goals down into smaller goals. Make sure each step of the goal ladders up to your 10-year vision. Having goals gives people hope and improves their overall well-being. Achieving your goals will strengthen your mindset, happiness and satisfaction.
Pleasure
“Plant seeds of happiness, hope, success, and love; it will all come back to you in abundance. This is the law of nature.”
Spend time in nature
Connecting with nature improves your overall health and well-being. I used to proudly tell people that I’m not an outdoor person because I’m a city girl. However, living in Vancouver, nature has a way of growing on you. Studies show that spending time with nature stimulates your brain, heals your body and boosts your immune system. If you’re like me and the thought of overnight camping makes you cringe. Then start small with a low-commitment hike and build from there. Canada has some of the best natural attractions globally, and every province in Canada has impressive natural parks and hiking trails.
Engage in awe-inspiring experiences
Awe allows you to remember how small you are in the grand scheme of things. Whenever you have an awe-inspiring experience, you gain a new perspective, which can fuel your appreciation for life. Standing on top of a mountain, watching the birth of a child, overcoming adversity, and the list goes on. Remember, when an experience completely blew you away, reflect on how you felt in the moment and apply that perspective to pursuing your goals. Awe can have so many effects, but the most powerful force is giving you a renewed sense of energy and a positive mindset.
Pursue what makes you smile
The act of smiling is so powerful that several studies show that smiling produces a physiological response and reduces stress. You know the activities that make you smile, so create more opportunities to smile. For me it’s dancing in the mirror to my choreography, for you it could be cooking a nice meal, watching a comedy or painting. There is also the act of merely smiling. Experts show that smiles keep our bodies happy and healthy. Smiling when there may be nothing to smile about at the moment, maybe challenging, and it will take practice to become natural.
Positivity
“Happiness is not the absence of problems, it’s the ability to deal with them.”
Eliminate positive thoughts
Physically remove the negative thoughts that tend to sound in your head. Write them down, cross them out and throw the piece of paper away. Do this at least once a week. You choose either at the start or end of the week. Psychologists say the physical act of getting rid of negative thoughts is most effective.
Look on the bright side
One of my favourite resources on cultivating a positive mindset is the Start Where You Are a journal for self-exploration. One of the exercises in that journal is to list things that bring you joy. Reflect on a time when things didn’t go your way and think of three positive outcomes. You will notice a shift in your perspective right away. The moral of the story here is when negative experiences occur, focus on the positive results. This will build your ability to always look on the bright side of all experiences.
Keep a positivity journal
The act of writing something down every day has been proven to be therapeutic. Experts say when you write about an experience you’ve had, it is like experiencing it a second time. Take 5 minutes at the end of the day or the beginning of a day to write down your positive experiences. As you write about your experience, your positive emotions will rise to the surface and frame your mindset. You will continue to seek out more positive experiences throughout your day.
Gratitude
“If one’s life is simple, contentment has to come. Simplicity is extremely important for happiness. Having few desires, feeling satisfied with what you have, is very vital.”
Take time to show gratitude
Some companies take time at the start or end of large meetings to show gratitude. If you don’t currently do so at your company, take the initiative to recommend it as a practice. Send notes of appreciation to your friends and family or start a gratitude email chain or social media post and invite friends to continue it. Whenever I receive these, it completely lights up my day, and I’m always happy to join in.
Record moments of gratitude
In addition to your positive experiences, write 3-5 things you are grateful for each day in your journal. It can be large or small; however, getting into the habit of gratitude will cultivate a positive mindset.
Write a self-compassion letter
Reflect on your limiting beliefs about yourself and write them down. Then write a letter to yourself expressing words of encouragement, compassion and gratitude. Our inner saboteurs are often the harshest voices, and we need to combat them with kind words. When speaking to our friends or family members who are down about themselves, we can become the most exceptional motivational speakers. We often need to talk to ourselves in the same manner and see yourself as your own best friend. One of my favourite personal development blogs by tiny buddha has a great article on how to become your biggest fan.
Connections
“I do my best because I am counting on you counting on me”
Collaborate with others
Building connections with others is vital to your health and well-being. Human beings are wired for connection and collaboration. Sharing experiences with others makes the experience more meaningful and worthwhile. Seek out collaboration and connection with others. If you are working on a career goal or other life goal, it’s essential to share your journey with others. Also, share positive experiences with friends and loved ones. Cultivating a practice of collaboration creates more positive experiences and achieves a positive mindset.
Become an active listener
We touch on active listening in our post on playing your part to create an inclusive work culture. Truly listen when you are in conversation with people and aim to have them feel understood and heard. It can be effortless to default to self-absorption when facing challenges or working on achieving a goal. Take the time to truly listen to people in your life and build connections with them. Adopt phrases such as “What I’m hearing you say is_____”, “I understand that you_______”, “What do you mean by_____.” Mirror their body language and make eye contact.
Seek out new connections
In our post on the do’s and don’ts of building a meaningful network, we give tips on seeking out new connections. I come from a family of like-minded people who are generally pessimists. It was a joy for me to meet people who are optimistic and expect positive outcomes. As I settled in Canada, growing a new network of friends and colleagues has tremendously improved my life. Seek out relationships with people who do not think like you. They will positively add to your experience and perspective of the world.
Kindness
“Always find opportunities to make someone smile, and to offer random acts of kindness in everyday life.”
Engage in acts of service
Acts in service of others are the key to bringing positivity to your life. Act of service is my love language, so I am happy to give my time, energy and resources to others. When you give, it should not be out of obligation but a true calling. When you feel you do not have enough financial resources to give away, give your time or talent to someone less fortunate. A useful resource for donating financial gifts is Canada helps and for donating your time volunteer Canada.
Meditation
“Mindfulness, also called wise attention, helps us see what we’re adding to our experiences, not only during meditation sessions but also elsewhere.”
Take 5 mins to breathe
There are currently apps that show beginners how to meditate and cultivate a habit of meditation. After using headspace for a year and practicing yoga, I believe in the power of meditation. Meditation clears the mind, expands the mind, and consistently teaches the mind to focus on positive thoughts.
Mindful walk
Take 10 minutes every day to take a slow, mindful walk in your neighbourhood. Slow down your thoughts, focus on your breathing and take the time to observe all the sights, smells and sounds around you. Focus on the movement of putting one foot ahead of the other and empty your mind from all distractions. Connecting with the body takes practice and determination. If every day is impracticable, start with once a week and then slowly build up to every day.
There are so many practices to adopt to start to have a more positive mindset, and you have to be compassionate and patient with yourself. Rome was not built in a day, so adopting these practices will not happen overnight. Take each practice week by week and day by day.
Recommendations
I recommend starting with a positive practices journal to keep you on track and give you more ideas. It can also be helpful to begin this journey with someone who will hold you accountable.